As a young man, the moment you graduate , finish your national service and land a stable job, the old folks in your family and community will start bothering you with the good old tune “ when are you marrying?”.
If you are close enough to your pastor, he could even offer to throw up some few candidates at you if you need help .

By the time you hit 30yrs you are likely to have given up your bachelor freedom and settled down, hopefully with the woman of your dreams

Six months down the line, your family and church folks will be giving you hints of their expectation : your wife should be bulking up with a new life in her womb.

If one year down the line you haven’t given birth, you will attract all kinds of unsolicited prayers and help .

Your mother and in-laws will start saying things like “I can’t wait to carry my grand children on my laps “ .Eii pressure!

Perhaps you are on some family planning scheme just to get some stuff sorted out but who cares! Let the children flow now!

By 32, all things being equal your first baby arrives and that is when the games begin!

If you don’t play the game in the arena of life well, you will be saddled with the never ending financial obligations to your kids, which compounds as they grow for the next 25 years before they finally find their feet.
Imagine you had three kids all spaced by two years interval.
It implies that by the time the last born is 25 yrs, you will be 61yrs.
Boom, with all your productive life gone, and still having to support them with your meager pension, without any savings and investments you could draw on, life will take its toll on you!

You may not have secured any building property because you dedicated all your life to the noble cause of raising your children.
With no building for you in the city,you may have to return to the village and settle there, where cost of living is very low.

You become very anxious, praying for your children to land any job at all, so that your burden will be eased .
Also at pension ,your medical bills will start fattening up, without the superior health insurance your employer offered during your working days.

You look up to the children who are barely finding their feet to come to your rescue.
If it takes them longer to land a good job, you will be far gone, before they can actually support you.
Have you wondered why life expectancy in Ghana is 63 years? Yes, 3 years after retirement!

So what should one do:

  1. The fact is that Children are expensive. You better brace yourself when you plan to make them.
  2. The erroneous mentality that God will take care of your children without your active involvement will come back to bite you hard.
  3. Don’t give birth to children with the notion that a relative, friend or church will support you financially. That is such a gross irresponsibility. Why would you leave the future of your kids at the mercy of others?
  4. Be determined to secure a manageable building property before your kids get to class one. That should be equal to 6-8 years of your working life. A two bedroom on a half plot should do the trick. When you start building early, trust me, you will finish early. Building has a way of cutting out all wastage in your life as you direct your resource towards it.Your landlord can never be your friend, especially if you have to cough up bulk rent advance every two years .The earlier you break ties with paying rent the better for your pocket.
  5. Remember that as kids grow, so does their expenses, it is likely to overtake your income at a point and you will have to resort to loans to put them through higher education. This will mess your finances up forever. The antidote is to open an educational policy or investment for each child as they are born and keep the discipline in contributions .By the time they are due for college, instead of being stressed,you will only smile on your way to the bank!
  6. For this to work, you need to work closely with your partner to ensure you are all on the same page regarding the necessary sacrifice you collectively have to make at the early years of your marriage for a better tomorrow for yourselves and beloved kids.
  7. Lastly build multiple sources of income as you journey through your career. Apply all the knowledge and skills you will acquire from your employers to developing some side hustle. It will make life very comfortable in the long run if done properly.

Finally know that you can enjoy your full life and pursue your dreams even with kids. You don’t have to give up your ambitions because of your kids, but it requires tact and effective strategy to have the best of both worlds.

Never be that parent who shouts at her kids saying “I could have been this or that if it weren’t you”

Happy parenting

See you at the top

(c)Roland OFORI( Marketing Professional,Engineer and Author)

#rolandoforispeaks #corpoatenosyguy

NB: if you find this piece useful, please share with others.


There is something about always being bullied and despised as a child, being made aware you were a mistake, never being among the teachers’ favourite at school, being punished every time because of your prowess of making it to the hall of fame of talkatives , dreading the routine “go home and bring your school fees” episodes because you know very well that there was no money at home, showing up many times at school on a hungry stomach, trekking long miles, navigating dangerous rivers, den of weed smokers, bush and plantations just to get to school because you can’t afford the school bus.

There is something about arriving at school every morning drenched in sweat, skin draped with dust , ever looking tidy, getting punished for lateness though you set off hours before most of your class mates ever woke woke up from their beds.
There is something about always sleeping in class, not because you are lazy, but you were too tired by the time you arrived at school.

There is something about being immuned to the sound of the bell for break time, because to you it makes no difference if you can’t afford to purchase a school meal. All you have is a bowl of gari , scarcely rice, with an overworked palm nut soup which you carry in a polythene back everyday. At a point you get tired of eating the same food everyday, and decide that food is for the weak and learn how to thrive on an empty stomach the whole day.

There is something about not being able to afford the essential books you require to study, and being punished by heartless teachers because you have refused to buy the recommended books which has being laced with their “cuts”.,

There is something about borrowing textbooks from friends and spending all night to copy the contents into a notebooks ,because that is all you could afford.

There is something about challenging yourself to be one of the best students in your class, so that you could get access to your colleagues textbooks and sometimes food when they contact you to help them.

There is something about being inundated by phrases like “ you don’t deserve it”, “as for our family we don’t..” “ you are a small boy, take your time”, “ who do you think you are” , “ nobody will support your foolish ambitions” and yet pursuing what is in your heart to the surprise of all the naysayers.

There is something about taking the first step of faith, clueless but never afraid to fail because you say to yourself “ he that is down, needs fear no fall” only for God to smile at you in the end .

It suddenly dawns on you one day, that you are still here, you survived, that despite all the bruises you are still on course to the top.

Your adversaries don’t understand why they cannot break you, provoke you nor derail you. They struggle to understand why though they scheme against you, you still keep a straight face and smile at them.

What they don’t know is that you’ve been through far worse. You’ve survived the confrontation of entities that would have landed many in their graves.
You are not fazed, not because you are aloof or stupid, but because life has taught you early to choose your battles.

Never underestimate the power of adversity, for it is the crucible that births resilience, tenacity , faith, Humility and all the elusive virtues you require to succeed.
As they say, “what doesn’t kill you will make you stronger”

So whatever you are going through now, never give up .See you at the top

rolandoforispeaks. #corporatenosyguy

(C)Roland Ofori ( Marketing Professional, Engineer & Author)


There was once a fish who observed that every weekend, a bunch of animals gather at the river bank and compete in racing in the sands.

His interest in the race got deeper with each week. The crowd were getting bigger, the prize money was huge, and oh the bragging rights was something special.

So one day he came very close to the bank, signaled the curator of the competition that he was also interested.

The curator replied, are you really sure about this? The fish replied yes! I swim ten times faster than any of the contestants who run on the land. I sure can beat them without even blinking.

Finally the fish convinced the curator and got registered.

On the D- Day the fish jumped confidently out of the water and joined nine other athletes ranging from crabs, snakes, snails, , frogs, rabbit, etc..

The rules were outlined and the race gun triggered. But before the fish could move three steps, he started feeling uncomfortable,, it was losing consciousness, gasping for breath. It suddenly dawned on him that the water environment was totally different from the land. Somehow he realized that the abilities he took so much pride in were mainly enabled by the water environment!

The organizers saw the predicament the fish found itself in , confused at what to do, one elderly sports administrator recommended that the fish be thrown back into the water and immediately it touched the water, life came back to him. All his numbness left him and it was able to speed again.

The lesson in this story is that, God has fashioned us in particular environments for us to thrive ,If we decide to ignore Him and get lured to compete in strange environments because of their perceived gratification, we will lose out and get frustrated.

So know the environment God has placed you in, and ask the grace to function effectively in same.

Don’t get distracted by other peoples progress. Keep the focus and believe God for the best .

Stay blessed

#rolandoforispeaks #corporatenosyguy


The sudden demise of a good friend through a car accident years ago, got me to ask myself a whole lot of questions.
He was on his way to visit his newly born child and the wife when he met what will be his untimely death.
This brother cared so much about his family and would do everything in his power to provide the best he could for them. But the sad reality today is that He is no more”. But now that he was gone:

  1. Could the wife afford the school fees of the private school his adorable kids attended or she needs to downgrade to a public school?
  2. Can she keep up with the rent?
  3. What about the maintenance of the car?
  4. Will the utilities choke her little income ?
  5. Can she afford to take the kids to all the fun places they ‘ve become accustomed to?

The mere emotional toll the sudden lost of a loved one can have on you is phenomenal, especially your spouse, whom you envisage growing old and navigating the uncertain storms of life together.

That said it is unimaginable for the young wife to also bear all the financial burdens of the family in addition to her grief when the husband is no more.The sad reality is it happens so often.

She had to contend with the total downgrade of the quality of life just to be able to survive with the kids. It’s normally such a pathetic life that will even cause her dead husband’s corpse to cringe uncomfortably in his grave.

So as young husbands what can you do to mitigate some of these harsh realities?

Educational Policy with insurance component that takes care of your kids through tertiary education in case you are no more

Don’t start building your dream house right away, focus on securing a basic structure that can comfortably accommodate your nuclear family. I will even advise that share the plot of land with a good friend, so that you even have something left to start the building right away. After you’ve weaned yourself off rent and fully serviced your bank loans, you can now plan towards that dream mansion of yours and build at your own pace.

Invest in a personal/ life insurance package that can advance some lump some to cushion your family when you are no more. The least thing you want to do is to leave your spouse with debt from funeral expenses when you are no more

Have a will, clearly spelling out beneficiaries of whatever little assets you have acquired so far. Some external family members can get funny ideas about your property when you are no more. Make sure your nuclear family is protected with the right backings of the law.

Can you start some small business with the initial aim of getting enough proceeds to take care of home expenses?This pandemic has taught us that household essentials will always be critical. Can you get into buying and selling ?

Also are there opportunities to reduce household expenses ( especially food) by cultivating a garden? Rearing livestock? Fish farming? All these you can do profitably on a small scale .

As they say, life begins at fourty , so be determined at by the time you attain this magical number (40yrs) , which amounts to fifteen years of your working life on the average, you would have implemented the basics discussed above.

Before you start murmuring that you don’t earn enough to implement these things , just imagine the discomfort you would cause to your dear wife and those lovely angels and take the faith to start, no matter how small . You would be amazed at how quickly you will progress.

For the wives as well, don’t throw any opportunity to build wealth or financial independence because you got married. Life can be very complicated, so explore and build a business module that can help you afford the lifestyle of your dreams in the future.

We appreciate the fact that you want to look good always, but be discreet with your spending and do well to invest part of all your earnings( minimum 10%) consistently Into your future

Above all, never forget the God factor.

Stay blessed

(C)Roland Ofori( Author, Marketing Professional)

#rolandoforispeaks #financialindependence #menmentalhealth #retirement


A lady recently shared her experience with me about how her spouse had sabotaged her progress for the past fifteen years.

After secondary school, she needed to rewrite some papers. Around the same time there was a lot of tension between her parents who had separated and were undergoing a bitter divorce.

At a point she felt none of her parents cared about her.

She attended a church program and met this “wonderful“ man, who was about 10 years older than herself.
He gave her all the attention and love she had so longed for at home.
One thing led to another, a couple of visits, splashing of cash and bam, she finds herself pregnant.

The gentlemen was bent on doing the right thing so they came to see her Dad about the intention to marry her. The Dad was furious saying “ I have bigger plans for you, marrying early isn’t part of them. You’ve got to fix your grades and make it to a tertiary institution”

Our Christian sister was adamant, with the mum’s backing who was getting all kinds of “good money”anytime the daughter’s fiancée visited , they prevailed against her dad’s will , got some elders to coerce the old man to accept the marriage.

After her first birth, everything seemed well until she attempted to get into a remedial school and better her grades.

The husband, a businessman would have none of it. The few times she would defy his orders and go for the evening classes, her husband would show up and create scenes which embarrassed her greatly.

Soon, second baby arrived and then a third. At this point, the lady decided to rather build a retail business. She started one business after the other, but the husband was not supportive. He would watch her go take a loan with high interest to invest in her petty trading and watch her struggle unconcerned, though he could afford to give her that money without sweat. His point was that it wasn’t necessary and that she should focus on taking care of the children at home.

After the lack of support didn’t deter the lady, the husband employed sabotage, taking emergency soft loans and never paying or even dipping his hands in the wive’s coffers without her concern. He would then resort to abuse and threats anytime she demanded her monies back.

She later learnt from her husband’s confidant that the reason why he never supported her attempt to better herself through education or business was because he was afraid to lose her to another person if she grew in exposure and earning power. His plan was to make her totally dependent on her as long as he lives.

Fast forward today, the lady’s retail business has never taken off, still in subsistence stage.

The man’s businesses has has also significantly dwindled and is hustling just to get by, with children to take care of.

She looks back at her fifteen years later and believes she has underachieved her potential.

She said to me” I can’t believe all my intelligence and savviness has gone down the drain. As at now the only way I can pursue my dream in life is to divorce this selfish , insecure and shortsighted husband who would have none of anything called progress of his spouse, but for the sake of her children, I would still endure so that they can secure a better future”.
Her relationship with the Dad remains strained all these years, because the father still cannot believe one of his brightest kids didn’t do much with her potential.

After listening to her I concluded on the following:

  1. There is a big difference between squatters and tenants. Squatters love your incomplete version – simply because they don’t want to pay rent.
  2. Tenants however prefer your completed version and are willing to pay the full rent due you.
  3. A tenant is even willing to invest in your incomplete version for you to become complete
  4. A squatter has no such intentions. A squatter knows very well that the moment you become complete, he/ she needs to pay more rent so may resort to sabotage.
  5. When someone claims to “love you just the way you are” don’t get carried away until you are absolutely sure they are committed to “ loving who you could become”
  6. For not everyone in your life today deserves a spot in your future.
  7. If you don’t get rid of the squatters in your life today, they will get rid of your future tomorrow.

I will encourage you to take sometime today to evaluate the supposed friends and loved ones in your life to determine whether they are tenants or squatters.
Do they encourage you to be the best version of yourself or they rouse the worse in you”
Will they invest in your progress or that prefer you to be broke and dependent ?

And when you are done , you better cut all the squatters off your life before it is too late.

(C)Roland Ofori Larbi

rolandoforispeaks #corporatenosyguy


A story is told of a lady who booked an appointment with her doctor .
When they met she said to him” doctor, I have a wedding to attend in a week’s time and I need your help to lose 30kg before the wedding.
The doctor replied” this your ask is not possible , it will require a couple of months or years to achieve this”
The lady insisted saying “ doctor I know you to be brilliant and extraordinary. I believe there must be a way, please do something for me”. I am prepared to sacrifice anything to achieve this weight loss”

The doctor sighed and said “fine I sure can do something” The lady was ecstatic. The doctor continues, I figure that if I amputate both of your legs, you can lose the 30kg in time for your wedding. Let me know if you still want to go ahead”
His answer shocked the lady.
Disappointed she picked her bag and left the doctor’s office.

Lesson here is that in life everything worthwhile achieving takes time. Many of us want to skip the process and get the product instantly, but it doesn’t work that way.The process makes the product.

So take your time to grow in whatever endeavor you apply yourself to.

As my pastor normally says” if you seek short cuts in life, your life will be eventually cut short.

#rolandoforispeaks #corporatenosyguy


There is an uncompleted building near my house.Every morning I see scores of able bodied young men frequenting the edifice.
They normally return from it feeling relieved after leaving their own trail of “biological matter” around the structure.
The building will likely be very magnificent when completed, but for now it is at the mercy of all kinds of miscreants.

I kept wondering, why will people take the liberty to shit at someone’s property? It dawned on me that it is simply because it was uncompleted.

To be frank the same thing happened to me when i was putting up my house. In those days i would come around only to find that my site has been at the recieivng end if open air defeacaters.

There was this one time where i was surprised to find a squatter comfortably occupying one of my rooms without permission.

But guess what, the day i completed the building and was ready to move in, none of these miscreants have ever came around to mess up in my property!

We all go through phases in life, where at a point we feel like we are attracting only the wrong people and situations into your life. We feel disrespected and not accorded what is due us. I call it the uncompleted phase
But you need not lose focus, fighting the miscreants and squatters, instead focus on building your life.

It is only a matter of time, when all will come together. And when the time comes you no longer have to fight these unwanted intruders , they will fall off before you know it.

That is when you start attracting the right people in your life.

So keep your head down, forget the naysayers . Keep building until that dream is complete.

Stay blessed and have a productive week

rolandoforispeaks #corporatenosyguy

Voddie Baucham: “Why I choose to believe the Bible”–Fundamental Astuteness on Christian Apologetics, parts 5 & 6 – Fundamental Astuteness

Voddie Baucham: “Why I choose to believe the Bible”–Fundamental Astuteness on Christian Apologetics, parts 5 & 6 – Fundamental Astuteness
— Read on


I visited a neighbour some months ago. He is in his sixties, whilst talking about a wide range of subjects, we veered into family life. I asked him causally “is there something feel you still don’t know about your wife after all these years?

He sighed and smiled, after some hesitation he finally found his voice and said “ yes, I would really love to know exactly what my wife has done with her money for all these 32 years of our marriage life”

He went on to say “ let me break this down to you young man” .
He married his wife in his late twenties, they happen to be around the same age, in the same profession in the civil service.

They both got steady promotions and pay rises that came with it. And both retired in the same year.
The man said, all these years, he had to fully cater for the rent, utilities, pay school fees, give chop money and start his building project, which took him 15 years to complete. He claimed that though both himself and the wife were on similar pay grade, she never contributed to any of the capital expenditures for the 32 years they have been together. He relied mostly on loans and side jobs to waver through the little accomplishment God had bestowed to him today.

So I asked him again, why don’t you just ask her now? He shook his head and said in the past he had attempted dropping hints, but the wife had skilfully avoided any indulgence in of such enquiries into her finances. The man claims he comes from a tribe that took pride in taking care of everything his family needs all by themselves as “the men of the house”

I poked him again, so will you ever ask her this question directly then? He smiled and said to me” maybe on my dying bed”

He retorted again, “young man, to be a man in Ghana is not easy oo” You get a job, start saving, then a time comes when you want to marry, You are likely to fund all the wedding cost all by yourself. You may even incur debt if not careful. Then you need to rent a bigger place to accommodate the comfort your pretty wife deserves. The landlord are callous and will demand years of advance payment.

When you barely survive it, your wife gets pregnant, the kids pop up and then you are forgotten, you feel like a stranger in your own home.

You hustle to keep the decency of the family, then there is the incessant demands form your external family.If you are wise, you will manage to build some small structure for your retirement.

Whilst you are away hustling most of the time, you get to spend less time with your kids, they are mostly with their mother. If God doesn’t help you and you commit any blunder against your wife,our African wives have the specialty of denigrating you to your kids. By the time you are old, they hardly want anything to do with you. You never get praised for all your efforts. Their mum is constantly reminding the children of all your mistakes.

So you finally go on retirement, with all the kids gone, staying alone with your wife, the kids stay more in touch with their “hero” mum.
You feel miserable and unappreciated . Maybe that’s why we die early and leave our wives.”

He chuckled and said he wished me well. I left to my house wondering what to do with the flurry of information that has just been thrown at me.

What do you think?

  1. Should African working class mothers consciously take some of the financial responsibilitiesat the home?
  2. What is the extent of transparency in finances you will commend to marriage couples?
  3. Do mothers intentionally antagonise their husbands to the kids with the aim of retaliating an offence the man has committed against them?
  4. Are fathers under appreciated in this part of the world?
  5. Are expectations on fathers too much and unrealistic?

#rolandoforispeaks #corporatenosyguy

(c) Roland Ofori( Marketing Professional/ Author)


As a student of leadership, I always pose the question: “How do you keep yourself motivated and inspire those who look up to you during this crisis?” anytime I get the privilege to speak to business leaders from all walks of life. 

There’s been a common thread in their replies, aptly captured by one of such mentors, Mark Sandys, Global Head of Beer, Baileys & Smirnoff, Diageo “facing realities whilst giving hope”.

We are in extraordinary times, with stress and uncertainties on people and businesses never experienced nor anticipated. Most firms would hint to you that 2020 looked like their best tee ever till the pandemic forcefully halted and changed the world as we know it. We are very much aware that things will never get to “normal”, instead a “new normal” which will favor those who pay the price now to prepare for even in the midst of all this turbulence.

 I would describe leaders in this crisis period as bus drivers carrying a full load of students, caught in the midst of a terrible storm in the middle of nowhere. At the beginning of the storm, the driver instinctively parks by the roadside for conditions to subside. But after a while, when the rains and winds have subsided, he knows he can’t keep the bus parked forever. He may call for help only to be told that conditions at the other side are worse hence no immediate help available. He must move. But this is where it becomes tricky because the storm has left in its wake a thick fog which limits the driver’s ability to see his way clear. The driver is aware that it will take several days for the fog to completely clear, but he can’t wait forever with 50 kids. They will require at least food and water to survive. So, the bus driver decides to take the risk and move slowly and cautiously with the little sight of the road his eyes can afford him. He will have to frequently get down, perhaps walk a few meters ahead with his torchlight to ensure that road stretch is safe and is rid of hazards like falling trees, then hops back into the bus and drive carefully till he finds the nearest town.

 So, what does it mean to Face Reality whilst Giving Hope?


 Like the bus driver, leaders have to warm up to the fact their span of control has greatly diminished because of this crisis. They won’t be on top of issues as much as they would love to. It is okay to demonstrate vulnerability in a very authentic way to your followers without triggering fear in them. 


Leaders don’t have the crystal ball to be able to predict how things will pan out even in the next few months. But what they can do is to adopt a very agile approach in studying the sharp learning curve of this crisis and the impact on consumers, trade partners, regulatory environment, etc. and making decisions with the insights gleaned from the learning curve for the short to medium term.


There should be a lot of transparency in business leaders’ dealings with their employees. A proper understanding of the impact of the crisis on cashflows, salaries, employee retention and business sustainability, shared on a consistent basis will be vital. Leaders should clearly define the baseline that must be achieved to sustain the business, what triggers will turn the business around etc. An informed employee will be more confident both in their leaders and future possibilities.


Hope is such a potent weapon to the human will to survive. It has been in many cases been the difference between those who survive adversities like a shipwreck, prison camps, sickness, and those who don’t. 

 There are well-documented experiments like two mice put in containers of water. The conditions of the containers are the same except that one container is placed in a completely dark room, whilst the other is placed in a room with a thin gleam of light. Interestingly the mice in the environment with the thin gleam of light tend to hold on longer than their contemporaries in the dark environment. That light-triggered hope of a possible rescue.

 In the same vein employees will be more than willing to go the extra mile when they have hope of a better future when all this is over. Of course, we don’t know how long, but we are certain it will all be over, and things will get better someday. As a leader have you clearly painted a mental picture of what the future holds for your business when this crisis is over and shared with your employees?

 The Human Touch

 There is something about going the extra mile to connect with employees in times of crisis. Though you “see” them every day on those zoom calls, it is not enough. A two -minute personal phone call will do more to your employees than you could ever imagine. It even gets better when those personal calls are done at a skip level. As Maya Angelou puts it “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” 

Let them know you care deeply about their well being and you are in this together. Those conversations shouldn’t be done out of compulsion but genuinely (for they can smell it if you are not being real). The dividends for those personal engagements will come in handy in the future.

 The Gift of Time

 We’ve never had so much time on our hands like this before. This crisis has given us the opportunity to spend quality time with our family, look into the eyes of our loved ones, and spend time doing things we genuinely cherish. But most importantly it has given us a window to re-evaluate ourselves as individuals. How effective are you as an employee? Are your strategies robust enough? Do you have to unlearn and overcome certain self-limiting beliefs and habits? Do you have the requisite skills to remain competitive in the future? I believe leaders can put some intention behind channeling this once in a lifetime window as a capacity-building period for their employees to ensure they are more competitive and resilient as a business when this crisis is over.

 I will conclude by quoting from the good book “For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us” Romans 8:18

Things will get better in the end and you will emerge stronger, make sure you have prepped your business for the future.

#rolandoforispeaks #crisisleaderhsip #givinghope #facingrealities

(C)Roland Ofori Larbi ( Author, Marketing Professional)